If you had to put a dollar value on women’s role in the home, what would it be and why?




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  1. Fletch 1 year ago

    there is no way to put a specific dollar value.

    my wife works at a ‘real’ job, and we both run our businesses. I take care of ‘house stuff’. Not even sure this applies to my situation.

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      Scarlett 1 year ago

      @Fletch do the women of the world, who have been oppressed a great many years deserve any restitution?

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      • Fletch 1 year ago

        @Scarlett

        Didn’t their reward come when their children become productive members of society?

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Scarlett
        In a word, no. There needs to be a “statute of limitations” on damages and “victimhood”; lest people lapse into it as a permanent state-of-being. Just look at our once-proud Native cultures who are running around generations later never healing from injuries not inflicted on them save by proxy; waiting for “others” to come and “fix them”; and being further “victimized” by the names of various sports teams.

        Many social movements start to address very real issues; and in doing so tend to garner a lot of power and voice, directly proportional to the nobility of the original cause. Whether worker’s rights, sexual inequality, racial inequality, sexual preference, or drunk driving to name just a few of the more common ones.

        But not a one has proven wise enough to know when they’ve made good ground towards accomplishing their goal or when it is realistically “conquered” . . . and standing down. Voice and power are VERY hard to put down, so the movement goes to seed — looking for “new victimization” to justify their existence.
        Groups are rising to try to run everyone elses’ lives . . . while proving startling inadequate at running their own life. Why fix and heal yourself . . . when you can rage at others who need to do it for you?

        And one way this is seen is in manufactured and perpetual victimhood, originally seen as a way of avoiding losing steam . . . but eventually and inevitably it degrades into a kind of genuine self-inflicted victimhood — where fringe-examples are seized upon (ie, the “rape-culture”, misandry), data skewed, outlook biased . . . and at it’s worse, these “victims” become the new “victimizers” of others — often in similar ways to the original “sin” against them. (related to the cycle of abuse).

        In the specific case of feminism, we see a lot of this. Women “self-victimize” over things that only marginally or even never happened to them. I’ve heard them cite inequality issues in other countries as their justification for their self-destructive victimhood and rage processes. Or insisting they will not stand down until . . . essentially . . . human beings stop doing what human beings tend to do to one another!

        And there are a growing number of stories about feminist school-teachers seeking a kind of (hopefully) subconscious “restitution” on the backs of young boys who weren’t even alive when great-grandmother Myrtle was oppressed by great-grandfather Moe in a socially-acceptable way. Or harangue their husbands or boyfriends — or anything with a penis — over inequalities they’ve never personally visited upon any woman; and would not tolerate happening in their presence! The net effect is an actual systemic poisoning of themselves AND the public opinion against them — which then calls for even greater and greater attempts to re-animate the corpse of their “noble intention”. (But they just end up grabbing for more and more extreme biasing and fringe-example to support their dying cause!)

        Another prime example is fearing a date-rape from someone they’ve agreed to meet in person for a first date . . . when they would be better off fearing food-poisoning from the main course. (The odds are greater).

        Issues of gender equality still need tweaking. But the laws exist — not to mention scads of special-interest groups that will rush to the defense of any shade of woman-oppression . . . while boycotting and protesting and shutting down anything with shades of helping men who might be now facing the same at the hands of the feminists!

        Consider what has happened around the world with the release of the film “The Red Pill”. A woman decided to film a documentary on “The Rape Culture”, but found out things were not as they seemed and ended up documenting the rebound-issues feminism was inflicting on men and boys.
        Angry feminists have threatened movie theaters and corporations threatened to pull funding if they show it. There are no shortage of youtube clips of angry incensed feminists telling you how bad the film is . . . but they have never seen it it beyond extracting clips from context!

        No.
        Feminism needs to stand down and be replaced with social movements of true education and equality. We need to stop trying to fix the world’s problems by addressing the issues, concerns and feelings of just 1/2 the population, based entirely on their sex.

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  2. Jear77 1 year ago

    They say that even a common housewife’s “normal” duties are worth several million a year if they were to bill for all they do. The services of a prostitute, bookkeeper, companion, tutor, chauffeur, chef, home decorator, maid.

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    • Fletch 1 year ago

      @Jear77

      several million is a BIG exaggeration. but if that’s really the case, I am putting your ‘several’ at 4 million. $4,000,000 = 24 hrs a day x 7 days a week x 52 weeks a year is $450/hr

      pretty steep

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @Fletch actually it’d be more like base, after 8 hours 1.5 X, and for the 3rd 8 multiplied again at 1.5, and over 40 multiplied again at 1.5. Adds up pretty quickly, yes?

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      • Fletch 1 year ago

        @Jear77 the 3rd hour would be for sleep. i don’t pay for sleep :wink:

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @Fletch is anyone guaranteed a full 8 hours of sleep? Think of pregnancy, getting up to go to the bathroom, compulsively checking on the kids at all hours of the night.

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      • Fletch 1 year ago

        @Jear77

        I agree that mothers are ‘on call’ 24/7/365.

        BUT so am I.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        Last I checked, they know what causes pregnancy . . . and in MOST cases, it is a choice.

        And a choice one has no excuse for going into with their eyes closed.

        This is part of having kids and raising a family. If one doesn’t want this, they can opt out of it.

        Or if they don’t think it will be lucrative enough! Putting a price on parenthood is still just an example of messed-up thinking.

        Add the biasing of feminism on top of it, and it spins ludicrous for the sake of supporting a cause that has accomplished the framework for the realization of their goals and needs to shut the emotional song-and-dance down as society adjusts to this new reality.

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz meh. I’ll never be a parent. I’m too old.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        Don’t overlook becoming someone special in the life of a friend’s child. Being a godparent is a pleasing experience that everyone benefits from.
        And working with children professionally has it’s benefits too.

        How do you think I have such an understanding of how people grow and the mind develops? (and have such a vast array of off-color jokes and perspectives?!)

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz I will not ever. Too much potentiality for trouble in this day and age.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        I . . . understand.
        The parent has to give permission, and then one has to honor that permission with integrity.

        But if acquiring physical possessions and wealth involved similar risk, I don’t think I would see you so quick to exclude yourself!
        It comes down to what we make important. Having a positive impact the life of another echos into future generations. Particularly a child.

        I think of how worse off I would me if all the adults who came to help me along my way had decided the risk of involving themselves was too high. (Shades of the Native American Medicine Circle in there. What was bestowed upon me, I have a duty to share forward).

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz In this day and age it’s VERY inappropriate to talk to someone child who’s not your kid (or close relative) or if you’re not a babysitter, teacher, a coach, scoutmaster, or similar role. I tried to do the substitute teaching thing, but because of my past behavioral issues (talking in class at that, not fighting, throwing things, or other types of disruption), the teachers were freaked out (when they should have been glad that I got past them). And even though I know it, I wasn’t about to invite scandal needlessly into my friend’s life who told me this.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        There’s an old saying about those expending the energy to make excuses for why something wouldn’t work, not having sufficient energy left to make it work.

        I forget the exact wordage.

        But the gist is that there are boat-loads of people who can find excuses for every one who just makes it work.

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz Even if offered, I can’t risk it, ever, under any circumstances. Period. The fact that the teachers were freaked out is more than enough evidence to tell me any such door is forever and permanently closed, irrespective of any other circumstance(s). But I have nothing against those who do and will make it work.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        I’ve found teachers to be only marginal “authorities”; even if that.

        But return to the observation that those who want to make it work, tend to make it work.

        But will not if their energy is spent seeking excuses. Your responses to me indicate someone who would benefit greatly from re-connecting with your own childhood, perhaps by helping another child find their way.

        Yea, it’s scary; particularly in today’s climate of fear and isolation.

        But I note that almost EVERY analogy or comparison I give you based on the basic human process of immaturity developing into maturity . . . is . . . lost.

        Isolation is one of the favorite ploys of the enemy-of-life. Are you effectively isolated . . . even from your own childhood??

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz my childhood is the last thing I need to reconnect with, as it would do more harm than good. Who wants to go back to a time in their lives when the majority of what they faced were severe problems that I was powerless to do anything about? Poverty. Bullying. Teachers who misunderstood me and thought I was a problem. Lack of friends. Abuse. No.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        Slivers that are not removed, fester.
        Internal injuries not healed, abscess.

        You keep saying there is no proof of “God”, and I keep saying it is a function of fellowship and participation which yes, involves an initial “leap of faith” (as all relationship does). I’ve shared just some of my many childhood experiences of all the same things you mention and more. (And many more I don’t share in this forum). I don’t fancy competitions of “Who had the worst childhood”; but I think that I could bury most in a landslide. Yet here I stand, saying I would not change one thing even if I could. I’m grateful for every experience; because they have made me who I am.

        My “proof” is all of these “slivers, wounds and impactions” that have been or are in process of being totally healed as direct result of my process with God in fellowship with His Spirit. (Not with religion — that’s just us thinking we can leverage God/Life to service us)

        The path to healing is there, and I would bear witness to it’s profound efficacy. Most of what I share here is testament to how well it works.

        And as a function of pure hindsight, most people who find simple and effective relief of a life-long “impaction” (psychological or spiritual abscess) end up asking themselves why they didn’t give it a fair trial sooner . . . or why those suffering similarly find SO MANY excuses . . . to not drain the abscesses that cause them so much discomfort and dis-connect from being a fully integrated and realized Human being!

        You will never be a “complete” person, until these things from your past are healed and integrity is returned. This is the main reason why we struggle so to find exceptions to every process that might heal us: we fear what being fully integrated and realized, might be like.

        We fear that we might have to actually start taking responsibility for ourselves and where we choose to be in our lives. And this terrifies. We would much rather bury that fear under things like possessions, consumerism, wealth, worldly “success” etc.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        Internal wounds and “impactions” that don’t heal, abscess and over time toxify the entire organism.

        I know all of the childhood things you mention — and perhaps a good deal more. I testify that they put me in a dire place similar to the one you’re in. I share how I wallowed in that for years, seeking release but never finding it . I’ve shared how the lack of personal “integration” led me to the same levels of fear-of-self you hint at.

        And I’ve testified to what totally resolved these issues and re-integrated me back into a whole Human being, capable of whatever level of spiritual fellowship with Life I care to try.

        Fearing your past and what it may make you capable of, is a fracture in one’s psyche. It cripples; complicates the simple; incapacitates; colors perspective and even outlook.

        And like most people who have been successfully healed, they tend to marvel at how others find so many excuses to not begin the process themselves (you’ve known religion, and a book . . . but not God’s Spirit; the very DNA of Life).

        But then, humility reminds me of just how vehemently I found so many excuses to not take the first step and eventually realize full healing and integration of so MANY aspects of my past.
        And the very things that once made you weak and incapacitated . . . now make you strong and sound.

        This is why I repeatedly share that I would not change one aspect of my past, even if I could. I am not at odds with my past.
        It’s a fully integrated part of the whole person I am today. Because of the things I’ve conquered; not in spite of them! And this entirely because of ongoing fellowship with the very Spirit of Life.

        Something anyone can know if they really want to . . . more than they want to make excuses and celebrate incapacity.

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz the problem with your viewpoint is it’s all in retrospect. Retrospect, Hindsight is nothing more than a mirrage, an illusion of your mind saying that i did x and y happened… or y COULD have happened. You’re falling fot the “post hoc ergo propter hoc” fallacy, i.e. “i accepted god into my life, ergo he did this” you think. There’s nothing you’re saying that couldn’t have been fixed, dealt with simply by a combination of the passage of time, a change of circumstance, hearing different views and becoming wiser through the life’s experience. As the saying goes “Time heals all wounds.”

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        I invite you to point out any good relationship that is not a function of retrospect!

        When one’s childhood is as messed up as mine was, “passage of time” isn’t an option.

        Maybe people having easier childhood passages can afford to wait to start living.

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz these relationships are based on physically being there. Sorry but god is never here except in spirit. You can’t call him, you aren’t going to get a response if you write. That’s less than meaningless. It’s thoroughly worthlessness to discuss such a being.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        I have a different outlook.
        I have had very tight friendships with people I’ve never physically met. One of them lived in Germany and passed away earlier this year from cancer. In all ways that count, she was like the older sister I never had. We supported each other through all aspects of life; and I still grieve for Vera.

        Backwatching (Annette) is another fellowship that never had a personal aspect to it; but both of us were impacted greatly by each other.

        I’ve never met you personally. But our spirits have connected and most places I go, you are not far from my thoughts.

        So we have there the framework for expanding our understanding of fellowship and just how many “barriers” (actual or imagined) it can overcome.

        I understand that your “incantation” never had a spiritual aspect to it. But this is where many have testified that they “get their responses” — myself included.
        The trick, is learning to control the screaming of our own skepticism (ego, stubborn pride) so we can hear the whispers of a God who loves us enough to let us chart our path in His presence; or in His absence.
        Our choice. And for this to be, I would contend that God’s voice needs to be a whisper that our screaming ego can overshadow should we wish it. (Up until the point where that ego ends; then God’s voice prevails)

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz The point at a day’s end is there are some choices that should be impossible, irrespective of the reality.

        The LEAST example is the death of millions of Jews caused by one man (and people following blindly) as in the Holocaust – when the solution is easy… don’t let that man come into existence. Don’t let him come to power.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77

        Freedom is either freedom, or it is not.

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz what about messing with pharoah’s free will? “God hardened his heart.” So God is not above tampering with free will.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        Religion and book-worship requires this POV: and to not have it is “heresy”.

        Beyond these, one is free to see a a people SO primitive that they didn’t even have psychiatrists to explain natural Human processes to them. They see someone repeatedly denying and writing off increasingly impressive displays of a God they already have SOME experience with . . . and to them it would seem obvious that God is doing it.

        But they would also stub their toe in the morning and start looking for reasons God was angry with them!

        We on the other hand can see the dynamics at work here . . . should we wish something better than just blinded “religious dogma”. The Israelites had already had “experience” with God and his power. The Pharaoh didn’t have this.

        What the Pharaoh did have was an assertion that he WAS God incarnate; and it was by this power alone he was able to rule. To have another “unknown” God prevail over him would to him, mean the end of himself and the society he “god-ed” over. There was far more fleshly ego at work than God tampering with his free will.

        Escape the religion Jear! You have to be your own Moses and by the same power of the Spirit, say “Let my people go!”. And then walk away from it. Don’t settle for being the embodiment of the Israelites that grumbled and bitched at their freedom and kept wanting to circle back to bondage!

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz you missed a response so I’ll copy it here

        actually the manipulations continue to this day. Never forget “Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another.” Rom 1:24 NIV
        Basically I read what it’s saying is that after a point god FORCES people to continue in actions (sin according to the bible) after a point no matter if they truly want to escape out of it, no matter how hard they try. The amplified version echoes this sentiment…

        (There’s more that I didn’t put so I will continue this thought here)
        What of generational curses? The bible states that God “visits the iniquity of the fathers upon the children and the children’s children to the third and fourth generation.” So that means that 4 generations out will have their freedom of choice taken away from them! That is a HUGE problem. So these things aren’t isolated incidences. It’s god’s very BUSINESS to manipulate humanity and individual lives biblically!

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        What then of freedom?

        And with that particular event firmly in “the past”, what is the fear of?

        Our feelings relating to it.

        If we learn to manage our feelings (not be owned by them), we won’t have to walk around wishing people into non-existence — and hoping nobody is wishing us into non-existence!

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz actually the manipulations continue to this day. Never forget “Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another.” Rom 1:24 NIV
        Basically I read what it’s saying is that after a point god FORCES people to continue in actions (sin according to the bible) after a point no matter if they truly want to escape out of it, no matter how hard they try. The amplified version echoes this sentiment…

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    • griz 1 year ago

      @Jear77
      If it’s just a sterilized business contract remember to subtract things like room and board, personal use of things belonging to the household like the car, working uniform (June Cleaver fancied fancy dresses, pearla, and high heels!), accumulating share of equity in the house or Investments.

      The point is, one cannot sterilize the role of mother and homemaker into just a business equation . . . Without removing all the humanities from it.

      So what shall we do for an encore? Put a price on fellowship? On true relationship?

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz the lack of money woes would make ANY relationship – casual association, someone you see daily but have no friendship with, casual friendship, close friendship, boyfriend/ girlfriend, marriage… even separation, divorce easier. The lack of money and arguments over how its spent is the biggest cause of divorce. I want enough money where I never have to worry about it ever again.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        The love of money destroys almost every good thing it touches.

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @griz not so. I have seen where the lack of money destroyed people time and again. The people in 3rd world countries, with money could afford to go elsewhere, start a new life… or better their own circumstances. As it is, there’s starvation, disease from having dirty water, and unsafe structures to live in. I have seen where if my friend had not the money he had on him, that lack of money would have put him in prison. BTW what he did wasn’t a bribe. It paid off the entire ticket the moment he received, and all associated fees with processing i it and it was recorded as having done so. There’s lots of people who are on the streets today that if they had a few more $ saved up (or earned while working) where that could have been eliminated. So these people wanting money to improve their lives are all there because they desired money? No. These circumstance are because of the LACK of money.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        Even the love denied you, still registers as love to you.
        One doesn’t have to have money, to be a lover of it. Whether partially or above all else.

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    • Author
      Scarlett 1 year ago

      @Jear77 do you consider this a post feminist era or do you think the feminist movement has barely taken flight.

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @Scarlett we’re in the midst of it. Boys can’t roughhouse without getting in trouble. In ages past people had a fight, got up shot hands and were friends. In this day and age due to feminism, boys fight, one takes out a gun and blows the other away. This situation is largely due to feminism.

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      • Author
        Scarlett 1 year ago

        @Jear77 I’m afraid I’m not following.

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @Scarlett The point of feminism, even though originally it may have been equality, has ended up feminizing boys/ men to the point where men’s normal aggression, which normally can be gotten rid of (quasi) constructively by fighting and letting bygones be bygones has been turned inward and due to this apparent powerlessness, boys (and men) lash out MORE violently than they did before – and sometimes in even more self destructive ways, and the result(s) is (are) disastrous for society. The problem is we can’t go back. we can’t stuff the genie back into the bottle. The only solution is to figure out how to go forward without either causing more harm or perhaps figuring out a way of (re)empowering boys (men) so they don’t feel the need to lash out in these ways.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Jear77
        Feminism needs to step down and be replaced by something more . . . human.

        Something that so much as is possible, equality-based . . . where one side is not raised to the fore over the other.

        Feminism didn’t stop the sexist inequality game from being played. The teams just switched sides of the playing field. And now comes the push-back.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Scarlett
        In a lot of ways, feminism is preying on the next-weakest group defined by sex: the boys. They are actively trying to alter the nature of boys at the grade-school level and even earlier.
        For generations there was great success at “taming” the wild creature of boys, into “gentlemen”. We still had that animal nature, but learned to control it into “approved” social outlets. The push of feminism now is to “alter” boys into “femi-men” — to say that a boy’s nature is evil, is at the root of all their problems. And the “approved social outlets” (competition, sports etc) are likewise being demonized and pushed into the realm of “evil”. So what’s a boy, feeling the call of their wilder side, to do??

        For the most part, boys have tried to comply — because this too is in the male nature. There comes a point where a path of resistance against relentless women is just too protracted and we “yes dear” our way to the path of least resistance: into our den or man-cave, or the local bar or strip club where the women are “seen but not heard”.
        It’s a far less “evil” than physically venting our frustrations against the women who triggered the frustration with their zeal to turn us into what THEY want!

        The problem is . . . that young men never learn this “gentleman’s way” (where I would tend to exclude the “Gentleman’s Clubs” — we can do better than this!). They just built resentment at being constant told they are evil because they have a penis and the urges that go with it.
        And they rebel . . . often with their penis.

        Feminism is actively fueling that which it moans about.
        The “cure” is a good deal worse than the original ailment.

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  3. ladybarbara 1 year ago

    Don’t get me started ———- !!!!!

    When I was a housekeeper, I charged $20.00 an hour and the going price nowadays is $25.00 an hour. When I worked for the comedian Chris Tucker, I charged him $35.00 an hour. When he was home he was ordering me around like a “cracker” slave owner and he seemed to get a thrill out of ordering the “White woman” around. I could wise-crack back at him — like Burta the housekeeper on Two and a Half Men. Then his mother, Mary, who I called “Mother Tucker”, loved to have me fuss over her and take care of her and her house. She called me her “White Woman that cleans my house”. I tried to get her to just say, “The Maid”, but she loved to say “White Woman”. It gave her a good feeling at my expense. So, I did not feel bad charging more per hour at the Tucker’s house.

    Nowadays, I should do a better job here around the house, but I resent that Immortal Pirate sits and watches TV, or sits on facebook and I would be doing everything by myself if I did not let things go — until I get help. Still, if I had a weekly house cleaning service, It would be $25.00 or $30,00 and hour and it would take her 5 hours to go through this hose with the most cursive of cleaning. That would come to $600.00 a month and that doesn’t count all the other things that Jear77 mentioned. For those things, add another $600.00 a month. However, I enjoy the cooking and caring for the animals. Cleaning up the front yards and gardening gets me out of the house, but a gardener would charge $50.00 twice a month. By not paying me, Immortal Pirate can afford his weekly body massages at Message Envy. I don’t know what that costs, but it makes him happy. You can’t put a price on feeling happy.

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    • Fletch 1 year ago

      @ladybarbara

      “You can’t put a price on feeling happy.”

      oh happy endings at Massage Envy have a price as well – although he’ll never admit it

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    • Author
      Scarlett 1 year ago

      @ladybarbara where I work, I am called the white lady. It doesn’t really bother me, but I had a friend who was called the white lady and hated it.

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      • ladybarbara 1 year ago

        @Scarlett I had to take into count that the Tuckers came from the South where they were poor and there was prejudice everywhere. Once Chris became a movie star (after the movie Friday) he was full of himself. It was when he built a beautiful house for his Mama (Mary) that I realized how prejudice the area they came from was. It was unheard of for a black person to have white people serve them. It was with this in mind that I surrendered to being Mother Tucker’s “White Woman” and I enjoyed her enjoyment of being my boss. She was thrilled about our positions in the household. I made sure to always wear the black maid’s uniform with the white collar and white apron. I made sure to always say, “Yes, Mam, Mother Tucker” and serve with a smile.

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      • Fletch 1 year ago

        @ladybarbara

        why did you let them treat you this way? actually I don’t care, but I don’t understand why people make these choices

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      • ladybarbara 1 year ago

        @Fletch I understood where their prejudices came from —- and, I was pleased to see the joy in Mother Tucker’s eyes that for the first time in her life, she could be the boss of a “white person”. She spent her life being a housekeeper in a white household where she was treated badly. I knew where her feelings came from. Mother Tucker was very kind to me. Chris Tucker, was sometimes an asshole, but most times he trusted me to get the job done. I charged them $35.00 an hour and sometimes that meant living at his house and putting in 140 hour weeks. That is why — while I employed 6 housecleaning teams in my business, I kept prime clients like the Tuckers for myself. I liked the work and I liked the money. I did not mind the hours and had my own bed in his house. It was prime work. The words “White Woman” was only words. In fact, I looked in a mirror and saw that my skin is white.

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      • Fletch 1 year ago

        @ladybarbara nothing’s worth the degradation for me. I believe you treat people the way they want to be treated.

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      • ladybarbara 1 year ago

        @Fletch I don’t understand that I was degraded in any way. As for the name “White Woman” ——– I am a white woman. As for being told what to do, that was my job. I was the housekeeper. I don’t see it as degrading, at all. I loved the work. I loved the job. As for Mother Tucker’s joy at being able to tell the Maid/Housekeeper what to do. THAT IS NORMAL. It was not degrading in any way. Not any more degrading than telling your gardener to do his gardening job, or telling a mechanic what you want done to your car. So, I don’t get what you are getting at, or is it your way to put me down —- pretending that my having a house cleaning business was degrading in some way. I was never degraded even once in all the 27 years I owned that business. I wore my uniform with dignity. All of my uniformed workers also worked with dignity.

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      • Fletch 1 year ago

        @ladybarbara

        NO?? – the money clouded your judgement.

        “It gave her a good feeling at my expense”

        “I surrendered to being Mother Tucker’s “White Woman” ”

        “he was home he was ordering me around like a “cracker” slave owner”

        “he seemed to get a thrill out of ordering the “White woman” around”

        “I made sure to always say, “Yes, Mam, Mother Tucker” and serve with a smile.”

        if you think he was treating you as an equal, try calling ‘Black Man’ and see what happens.

        I’m not putting you down as I respect the undocumented workers at our house – housekeeper, yard maintenance, etc – I think you were blinded by overcharging him $35.00 an hour. You decided that was better than the feeling of being degraded – and this is just my opinion. I wouldn’t do that, even for $35 an hour

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      • ladybarbara 1 year ago

        @Fletch I still did not find it degrading. I consider the source then let the comments go because Chris Tucker is a comedian and he came home from the studio with a bad attitude from long hours on the set. Being boisterous is part of his personality. I was amused for 99% of it. He was in a neighborhood that tried to block him from buying there —– they snub blacks. The worse snubber was ex-Governor George Deukmegian, who tried to block the sale of the house next door to him because a black man was buying it. When the house had to be torn down to be rebuilt, I heard neighbors say, “See!!!?!! You let a blackie buy in the neighborhood and look what he does to the house.” I was roaring with laughter over that. Then he rebuilt a mansion of a house. George Deukmegian had an open window where his wife liked to sit and enjoy the sea breeze. Chris made sure his house had a window just a few feet from George’s window. Then he had a phone installed and placed on the window table. The phone ring tone was “Camptown Races” and Chris would call that phone several times a day. We were not to answer that phone. We were to let the ring tone play —- “The Camptown Ladies sing this song …. Doo Da, Doo Da….” I thought that was hilarious. Working at Chris Tucker’s house was always fun and Mother Tucker was the sweetist lady and she always treated me kind. But there was always the joking and the black-white tensions, especially between Chris and the Deukmegians. My favorite was when Sean “Puffy” Combs rented a yaght that was too large to be sailing into that marina. He parked the big yaght in front of Georges house on the marina and he invited a large group of black people from Compton to throw a loud party. They served watermelon and fried chicken and threw the rinds and the bones on George Deukmegian’s lawn. I thought that was hilarious, too. In the nine years I worked for Chris, there was never a day that I did not have reasons to smile and laugh.

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      • Fletch 1 year ago

        @ladybarbara

        its my opinion you are rationalizing the degradation by the hourly over-charging and maybe a little smitten by his ‘celebrity’, as the name dropping suggests.

        “It was not degrading in any way. Not any more degrading than telling your gardener to do his gardening job” – so you agree it was degrading.

        I couldn’t do it, but again, its your choice, and you could

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  4. immortal_pirate 1 year ago

    Innumerable…

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  5. spitfire3dc 1 year ago

    you’d need to provide a job description and performance criteria before I would offer up a number.

    Not all women are created equal.

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    • Jear77 1 year ago

      @Spitfire3dC did you see my list? That’s just a start.

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      • spitfire3dc 1 year ago

        @Jear77 I saw your list and was frankly disgusted by it. It is sexist and reeks of chauvinism. There was no mention that the home was cohabitated by a female and a male.
        And why would a woman be considered a prostitute? Why couldn’t a male be referred to the same way? all the responsibilities listed could just as easily be an assigned responsibility in a home to the male of the species.

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @Spitfire3dC it CAN go BOTH ways, and it does… I was simply saying that what a good number of people generally think – and it doesn’t mean that’s how I think, I was just pointing out the obvious things that women typically do. There is an old joke:
        Woman goes into a bar, and a group of men are discussing their professions. They ask her what she is and she says “I’m a wife, you know: Wash, iron f***, etc.”

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      • spitfire3dc 1 year ago

        @Jear77 I understand the humourous intent,. The thing is, all that does in reinforce the cultural attitude that needs to stop. There are men, and in a lot of cases women, who actually live that “joke”

        To me it’s ironic that many men treat women as second class contributors, when in my experience, women are superior. I think that pervasive attitude that men display is a defense mechanism associated with that being found out.

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      • Jear77 1 year ago

        @Spitfire3dC My friend expects this of his girl. I, on the other hand, look at the work that it takes to upkeep a house and am satisfied living in a single room, (bed, desk, seat, some space for my clothes), provided I have access to a kitchen and bathroom.

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    • Author
      Scarlett 1 year ago

      @Spitfire3dC you’re a critical thinker.

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  6. griz 1 year ago

    If it’s looked at just as labor for pay, what does a live-in nanny-housekeeper make?

    Remember to factor out room and board personal use of vehicle etc, if we’re looking at this just as a paid position.

    But I think this cheapens the role of mother; unless the supposition is they are doing it just for personal gain.

    I understand why feminism wants to strike this biased comparison. But at the end of the day a career is just for personal gain and nothing else. No Love; precious few humanities. “It’s just business”, right?

    Is this what parenting has become in the 21st century??
    If so, pity the children.

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    • Author
      Scarlett 1 year ago

      @griz well lets see, even in 2017 there is a gender pay gap for professional “careers”, and men outrank women in holding high ranking positions. so, oppression of women is real. no?
      There are women who choose to give up careers outside their home to take on the important and esteemed role of raising their children.
      with your point about careers you are careening off onto a different topic. I suppose it is very subjective as to what a career is.

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      • griz 1 year ago

        @Scarlett
        There are not too many jurisdictions in North America where wage equality laws are not in place: and where there are not in abundance of gender-based special interest groups just waiting to lobby, protest, litigate and offer support.

        So where does this gender wage gap of feminism exist?

        Mostly in exercises of biased thinking where, as with the elusive “monetary value of a homemaker” exercise, not all compared values are equal. Men and women have a lot of similarities; but also a number of key differences. Things that can affect the jobs they seek, how they perform them and balance them with Family Life, spending and risk-taking strategies, and management style just to mention a few.
        If one just looks at an end figure and doesn’t count for all these factors, the result is skewed at best: intentionally biased at worst.

        The teams switching sides on the sexism playing field is not the solution.

        Movements that try to solve the species’ social issues by looking at the issues feelings and concerns of just half the population based on sex, need to be recognized as the sexism they are.

        We need a paradigm of equality, that still accounts for the manifest differences between the sexes.

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  7. Georockstar09 1 year ago

    So long as fathers also contribute equally around the house, it evens out.

    So long as children pass on their mother’s genes, mothers shouldn’t ask for more. But if the children are useless members of society that contribute little (not just no kids), I think kids should start paying for their parents’ help.

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    • Author
      Scarlett 1 year ago

      @Georockstar09 it is becoming much more common that a woman is the stable provider for the home. This question was designed to think outside the box. but, as you can see many people jumped to the conclusion that a woman’s role in the home was to cook, clean, do house stuff, raise children.

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    • griz 1 year ago

      @Georockstar09
      I remember an era where some kinds of Love still didn’t have to be paid for.

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  8. BelleMadre 1 year ago

    if i were in home care still id make 16-22$$ an hour doing what i do at home for free, as it were. so theres that?

    i think its more about thanks and sharing. who fills what role and why does our gender determine such things i wonder?! not aiming that at you just a question i always wondered about. for a time i lived in a home with a stay at home dad (or rather a hung over on the couch couldnt keep a job if he tried to have one dad) but he wasnt domestic. we learned to cook so we had more than white bread toast to eat. where was i going with this? i guess he just didnt think it was his job and maybe that wasnt gender based. maybe we get paid in food and home? is that what it was about in the 50s? man go to work and bring home bacon, woman cook bacon? maybe that sort of worked? i dunno man. i get why women shook things up.

    in my home, it is me and one 10 year old boy. he has his tasks, now he is older, this is his home, he can share the up keep of it. i wont do it all. i could but im not a stay at home person, so i dont always have time or energy and i think it teaches him a good few lessons in self reliance and besides he can put his laundry away anyway :D and i dont put a $$ value on his help. (not that its my argument, but i dont get an allowance either.) BUT i do once a month in the right budget week, give him some cash to buy something he wants or to save towards something (usually a video game or new basket ball or something). good lessons there too.
    im digressing. but the point is tied in because i dont put a specific monetary value on him doing his chores. he feels a sense of pride for helping keep the boat afloat as it were. i dont promise him a dollar amount cause mama might need that pay check for life expenses. but i dont deny him either because that way he has some incentive other than If you want lunch tomorrow at school you need to make it now lol (i supply the food he can make the sandwich. thats fair isnt it?!)
    ok im digressing again

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  9. Actual Retail Value: …Her Mind & Soul!
    Why: That’s what the data shows.

    It’s a volunteer gig.
    https://youtu.be/OzHBr0ndKus

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  10. There’s currently no system to accurately compensate people in direct relation to actual exertion in any occupational catagory.

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  11. tchavey 1 year ago

    Priceless

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