If so. How did you feel about it?




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  1. ladybarbara 5 months ago

    I was going to see her, but then, I decided not to.

    My twin lives in Bellflower, CA.

    My ( then) next door neighbor, Terri, does taxes in Bellflower. I was known to drop by her office from time to time — so it is not unusual for me to walk into her office and sit down across from her at her desk.

    A Bellflower woman made an appointment to have her taxes done by Terri.
    Terri sat at her desk finishing her lunch as the woman arrived early. She looked like me in every way, except her hair was dyed absolute black. My hair was died red for years.
    Terri looked up from her lunch and shouted, “What in the hell did you do to your hair?!?! You look like hell like that!!!”
    The woman was surprised by Terri’s blunt rudeness.
    Then Terri saw that it was not me and fell all over herself apologizing to the woman.
    Just to prove her point, Terri called the local bar where her husband was having lunch and told him about the uncanny look-alike to their next door neighbor, Barbara (that’s me). Her husband wanted to see this woman, so he and a few friends jumped in his truck and drove to Terri’s office to see her. I was sitting in the bar having lunch when the husband and friends came back, laughing that it was my doppelganger with black hair. I was going to go and see her, but the lunch I was eating was tacos and I did not want to leave my lunch. By the time I finished and dropped by Terri’s office, the woman was gone. But, everyone swore that she looked like me, except a little taller.

    How did I feel about it? A bit surprised and I wished that I had gone to see her. I was disappointed in myself for not making the effort.

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  2. immortal_pirate 5 months ago

    No. I don’t need to see a twisted version of myself in another. I have and have worked very hard to depart from the twisted person that I once was. I have not always been the mild mannered extraterrestrial immortal that I am now. One should remember, I was a pirate and still am…just not as violent as I once was, but still have the potential to be so.
    I learned to channel my violent tendencies toward something more positive, and I only let that ugly side of my character out when absolutely necessary. Self control is learned. The “twisted” me still exists, but I keep him on a short leash.

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    • ladybarbara 5 months ago

      @immortal_pirate Phil Robinson is very close to looking like you. But, his voice does not have the deep and mellow tones that yours has.

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    • griz 5 months ago

      @immortal_pirate
      I think it’s more like seeing echos of what one once was, what one chose not to be (the more mature/experienced processes); or what one might fear they could become (the less mature/experienced process).

      Like you, I can be extraordinarily calm because I know there is a beast within but that he is adequately “channeled” into positive expression.
      But I’m still young enough as an immortal that a series of downturns in a short period of time can find that control slipping and the beast emerging to ravage someone. (He’s good at it, because he’s had a lot of experience and training).

      But the growth process is evident in it taking a lot more significant, and a longer series of down-turns, before I start to growl.

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  3. griz 5 months ago

    Yes.

    And once I recognize any negative feelings towards them are really negative feelings associated with how I once was (or could have easily been) . . . I feel humble and am soberly aware of the responsibility that comes from having successfully done the hero’s quest to the dark underworld of the self and emerging re-born.

    THIS is “the meaning” in life sufficient to off-set any and all suffering induced by self-aware meta-consciousness.

    Any who have failed to “find God” metaphysically speaking (are beset with “sufferings” they cannot offset with sufficient meaning) . . . have not looked low enough or quested inside themselves deeply enough to the very core of their “underworld” and found salvation . . . from themselves.

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    • Author
      Jear77 5 months ago

      @griz Not a “hero’s quest” for me – actually quite the opposite. I see myself in a coworker, who is like me in many ways. But unlike him, (who is still living with his parents), I was able to have a “friend,” albeit one who gives me so much grief, help me. Despite his help to become more independent, despite the years of our friendship, despite *everything* he KNOWS (and has commented on it on more than one occasion) that should he cross certain lines AND I am made aware of said violations, I not only WILL turn on him, I MUST do so to protect myself. “Some thanks” is probably the appropriate response.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        Something a “heroic quest” circumvents, is the comparing ourselves to others.

        That’s a dead-end, because what use is a comparison against an imperfect?

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz maybe what the hero quest archetype needs *honest* self assessment and comparison to others to do it justice.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        Others are a touchstone, as proof against the self-deluding and toxifying effect of psycho- and sociopathic isolationism. (And this is where the postmodern neo-Marxist attack on freedom of speech is most dangerous; making people afraid to speak their mind, like in the Papa John’s witch-hunt)

        But comparison of one’s impending (and necessary) heroic journey to others is in error. Firstly, because it champions nothing higher than mundane convention. People are heroic because they step outside this into truly “unknown unknown” territory.

        And secondly this kind of comparison against others is the perfect fearful excuse for not undertaking anything brave or heroic in the first place.

        History’s evidence for this is that comparative convention tried to dissuade almost everyone that undertook truly brave and heroic feats that advanced the race in laudable ways.

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz says the one who believes that man was *literally* made in God’s own image. Nothing is higher… so any “advancement” is an oxymoron

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        I don’t think you understand that assertion, because I don’t think you understand that God is Spirit.

        Do you “see” that you are asserting an arrogance of Humanity’s ascendancy that isn’t even backed by sophistry?
        I honestly don’t think you do. And that you don’t see this as linked to why your “religious” venture failed.

        But even you (or your actions at least) reveal that you DO believe there is higher possibility and potential to reach for.

        You’re just looking in places it cannot be found.

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz I understand that fully! So the fact that man threw it away… only goes to show that man can’t do anything laudable… even with the entire universe backing him.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        Oh really!?

        Fully?

        I’m glad you could take a break from your levitating above the rest of us to participate in this lowly forum!

        Arrogance is perhaps the main reason why people find “nothing beyond self”.

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz “fully” as far as the bible’s language goes. Keep in mind one of the things that irks me about the bible is that words have precise meanings that change not, if you string together a list of words, each provides additional information, meaning, and use to the reader / hearer.

        Getting back to the topic at hand… man had everything, threw it away, for essentially nothing… actually threw it away not to be “grown up” as you claim, but threw it away so that he must be separated from god (if it exists). Far from being a “hero’s story,” this would prove that it’s quite the opposite. So both god was wrong in making man with free will, and man was wrong for throwing it away.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        It’s just that in the years I’ve known you you’ve made absolutely zero attempt to talk about or discuss spiritual topics. It’s always been about the letter of the law in the mechanics of the words.

        So here’s your chance to break it down spiritually. The Bible makes no qualms that God is Spirit and not flesh; nor any construct of the flesh such as language.
        Add to this that “spiritual things are spiritually discerned”.

        So how full is your understanding of the assertion you made that there is no possible advancement that we could make, simply because of the verse that says we are made in God’s image?
        I think your assertion is greatly misinformed by ideology.

        So what is it you feel we had in threw away? Just the ability to run naked live in the moment and not work?
        Many of the things you might count as curses such as awareness of time have also provided great blessings in the ability to plan and to sacrifice in the moment for the sake of future advance.

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz then the bible is completely and totally meaningless, along with each and every command, promise, and propecy.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        It’s priceless in preserving both the journey of our species into self-conscious awareness and in outlining a “better” way to make a covenant with the future through suitable sacrifice. Don’t let your Cain’s journey blind you to that. (Remember, he made a poor sacrifice that still was turned to good when he recanted)

        It’s also quite miraculous on 3 counts:
        1. That a primitive and newly self-aware people would find and preserve such advanced knowledge.
        2. That such pervasive archetypal threads would wind throughout it unto it being the very first hyper-linked document that the authors didn’t even know they were writing!
        3. That it would be preserved intact thru so many eons and present such an organizational base as to be assembled into such a cohesive collection of works considering how scattered the authors were throughout time, culture, social position.

        It would be like 66 works from random people starting today and extending through the year 3030 being found after all other works of that era disappeared, assembled, and found to contain a cohesive guide to successful living.

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz be that as it may, remember that you said in not so many words that our language can’t encapsulate, express, understand the spirit. So it’s useless.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        When have I ever said we cannot participate with the Spirit of God?

        That’s more your riff: even unto STILL patently refusing to discuss any spiritual aspects of your religious experience.

        It seems more and more like you just played a religious game and never had any true encounter with the Spirit of God.

        Hence my likening you to Cain; who also did not make a suitable sacrifice and descended into bitterness and resentment when things didn’t work the way he thought they should.

        Even a secular analysis can extract this from the story of Cain and Abel.

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz participation =/= (does not equal) complete understanding, therefore is useless, worthless. Give me *all* … or nothing. And nothing is good enough for me, as it’s what i always had. I’ll make do without.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        When does it ever?

        Unrealistic expectations of Total Control would sabotage any Fellowship.

        Which parent?

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz i had (and continue to have) an awesome relationship with my parents. I call them most days. A being that you can’t fully experience without dissolution into nothingness doesn’t count in that it’d be impossible, potentially dangerous/ deadly… so if it can’t happen in the physical, and I can’t get full benefits of it now (and since this is god we’re talking about… now really can mean now, not a second from now), i’m not going to try to persue such a thing.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        Learning to sacrifice a part of the present for a better future was one of the first lessons we allegedly learned once newly self-aware. It was the discovery of “the future”, and the notion that a suitable sacrifice in the now could in effect “bargain” with Life. (And unsuitable sacrifices would just leave us with bitterness and resentment, wondering what went wrong).

        Wanting it all now is essentially what we matured out of: for eons, until recent ideologies (which you have bought into big time my friend) sought to infantilize us back on the evolutionary scale. As I’ve said before Nietzscheze predicted . . . you . . . 130 years ago.

        Somebody taught you this sort of toxic fellowship with Life. It’s been with you for as long as I’ve known you; and you hold onto it so dearly, even against the logic you value. Do you want to start unraveling where this infection came from?

        Or just keep making excuses for it being in you?

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz Proof! I would need it all, for it to be meaningful for me to pursue. Once again… the proof would destroy me… and that’s fine with me, as (once again) we’re talking about god. He’d simply reform me (and keep doing so infinitely) without problems.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        So no.

        You don’t

        You want everything now in this moment before you will place one foot on the path to helping yourself. You want more “proof” than “proof”: because you endlessly excuse why you cannot even start the restoration.

        God only does what we cannot once we make the necessary sacrifice to start the process.

        Never that which we will not.

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz So we’re at a permanent draw, an impasse that will never go away. And I’m fine with that.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        Then you need to accept that you are at this point by your own choice: because with effort and some proper sacrifices you could be at a different point.

        But that our persistence in complaining and excusing and feeling like an oppressed victim about it, means that we really are NOT fine with that.

        For if we were we could cease all of the self-destructive behaviors I’ve mentioned.

        Your soul is not at peace because you are NOT fine with this. And it is very good to not be fine with this!

        But very self-deceptive to try to insist that we are.

        Our actions betray us. (One knows a tree by the fruit it produces, reliably and in abundance)

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz sacrifice without the reward i need. I know what my time is worth on an eternal scale. Millions to billions of dollars is chicken feed to god. Even a single million per year of my life would have $41,000,000 – after tax, fees, etc. I can guarantee if i got that type of money, i’d never have to work again, except for what i wanted to, and could easily look at this again, no problem because I would have the time.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        The ability to defer gratification is what separates us from the animals.

        You’ve not improved your lot by switching from a business negotiation to a hostage negotiation!

        Neither is fellowship nor participation.

        It is very hard not to return the observation that your upbringing was negligent in this regard. Which isn’t an indictment. One has to recognize the humanity and the failings of their parents in order to exceed them.

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      • Author
        Jear77 5 months ago

        @griz tell that to the entire sectors of society who die from starvation/ malnutrition, lack of affordable housing, treatable diseases, and/ or are miserable their entire lives because they don’t have the ability to afford these things. Most of the time these problems are never resolved EVER.

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      • griz 5 months ago

        @Jear77
        That suffering exists is no good reason to neglect doing everything we can to diminish the suffering in our sphere of influence.

        The HUGE conundrum of present postmodern society is that far too many of it’s tactics of thinking actually and demonstrably INCREASE personal suffering (increased nihilism and mental illness), rather than mitigate it.

        This ties into one of your threads of the day, “Doomed to failure”. The archetypal “Heroic Quest” has turned into the quest to actively undo oneself in a sea of increased suffering, meaninglessness, fault heaped upon others, nihilism, and the pleading cry for a kind of Marxist totalitarianism (equity of outcome at the hands of a tyrannically-empowered State) that has NEVER failed to crank out hideously gruesome results.

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