Yesterday, I was at my practicum, and I was doing a self-esteem group. For the ice breaker, each person had to go around the room and say something positive about themselves. The group was comprised of about 11 women, all 55 and older. Of the entire group, only one person said something positive about their being. The rest said something like “I like church” or “I enjoy making quilts”. Why do you think it is so hard for people to love themselves, and recognize their positive qualities. One thing we talked about was the pressure society places on women to be a certain size, not to age etc….




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  1. Jear77 2 months ago

    I think it boils down to the concept of sin, irredeemable except through the blood of Christ. This harmful, stupid concept, which has permeated all levels of society, says we are dirty, damaged, fuck ups, unworthy of anything except eternal punishment in hell in and of ourselves. It’s a concept that says that not even our thought life is sacrosanct – that qe are to dwell on things are true, right, lovely, pure, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy… no matter how hellish life around us might be. And this is why i must thoroughly reject such a Concept.

    In regards to the question asked in the class, i would state that “i am able to see things as they are, without any illusions that they are anything else.”

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    • five2one 2 months ago

      @Jear77 And not a concept found in the bible.

      Catholic concept.

      There is sin, and a need to be saved, but totally different from what you are saying.

      Sin means missing the mark, bullseye. It is a Greek archery term.

      It is about death, we need to be saved from, which sin is intrinsic to.

      Jesus saves from death.

      Gives immortality.

      That is the point.

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      • Jear77 2 months ago

        @five2one but the only reason this exists is because we were made. If there were nothing, no evil, no sin, no suffering. And to create evil knowing fully what youre making… how can such a being even attempt to claim goodness, holiness, righteousness… is utter insanity

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      • five2one 2 months ago

        @Jear77 You seem to definitely think you are smarter then God.

        Yet, you can not even begin to consider how things are, somehow.

        God must have really done a number on you Job.

        Sorry about that, though not God. Just the Behemoth.

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      • Jear77 2 months ago

        @five2one maybe just maybe time has moved on from the bronze age! There have been close to 3000 recognized deities. Because no 2 people’s experience, understanding or belief is identical, and there have been over 103 trillion people in existence. What that means is for all intense and practical purposes, there have been 103 trillion different gods. There have been zero gods who have shown up who were willing to submit themselves to scientific inquiries, a court of law to answer for the horrors of existence, or a comprehensive pannel of theologians consisting of literally every singke branch of every single religious belief system that has ever existed. Since none of these other gods have been able to provide proof of its existence in such formats as listed above, I’m 100% positive yours will fail to do so as well.

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      • five2one 2 months ago

        @Jear77 Why not say, ‘hey man, I am not fucking Job’.

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      • Jear77 2 months ago

        @five2one Job had it rough… but there’s people who’s had it probably rougher in that they never had all that to lose to begin with. They also had it rougher in that they never had good health to begin with, dying of cancer, or perhaps spent their entire lives in abject poverty – and starved to death! Then there are others who have mental problems and think it’s OK to torture animals to death or forever for not obeying their every whim, use and abuse friends, and make vague promises as to the benefits of dealing with them… oh wait… I’m describing the actions of the biblical god here!

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      • five2one 2 months ago

        @Jear77 IKR!

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      • five2one 2 months ago

        @Jear77 I luv my lil jeerleader. We gotta make you wealthy.

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      • five2one 2 months ago

        @Jear77 I mean, can you even begin to entertain the possibility that these two things are possible?

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    • Author
      Scarlett2 2 months ago

      @Jear77 yeah, and society is judgmental as a whole, as well!

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  2. five2one 2 months ago

    You look like you are in your 30s.

    It depends on where you take the population sample, I think. You probably will get a much more healthy reading from a poetry reading group, for instance, then a small town group where everyone goes to the local Baptist church.

    People do not show their deeper self, easily. This is wise, and natural. They show their superficial self.

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    • Author
      Scarlett2 2 months ago

      @five2one thank you for the compliment. I am 47 years old. I was facilitating the group. I am in graduate school and doing a practicum at an site that serves the aged and disabled.

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      • five2one 2 months ago

        @Scarlett2 Ah, nice, thought that was implying you were 60, I was like, whaaat? I am 48. Little sis. We could be related. Near same age, same weird site, something twins would end up doing — I am adopted. So, I don’t know.

        S 25 19 7 0

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  3. five2one 2 months ago

    On the title its’ self, I never look in the mirror and smile, but guys tend not to. I suppose. I don’t smile a whole lot. But, I am a fortunate one in soul, as is everyone here.

    And very happy.

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  4. Tits McGee 2 months ago

    after eating is always a good time to check your teeth for food remnants. Herbs, leafies, etc can linger

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  5. luftballooneyegouge 2 months ago

    A mirror is the wrong tool to use, to look for what’s good in life.

    I think the best tool for this is other people that you get along with well.
    Y’get to call your friends a buncha ‘Tools’!!!

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  6. 2Thrash 2 months ago

    I don’t know if people do have difficulty loving themselves. I think maybe they feel shame for admitting that they do. Just a guess, though. I have nothing to back it. ha

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    • Author
      Scarlett2 2 months ago

      @2Thrash yeah, I kinda think it may be related to how much and the types of trauma one has experienced in life. Also, their resiliency factor. I think some people also have the appearance of loving self, but is actually a damaged ego.

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  7. ladybarbara 2 months ago

    I smile a lot. I enjoy life. I think that women have a hard time saying something good about themselves because it is not nice to be too vain. I am kind and I am a good cook.
    As for my looks? I am fat, soft, round, and a “Grandmotherly” type.

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